The last good-bye

Return Trip

We got back to the Tattoo Guesthouse. I packed, showered, dressed, and ate, all like a perfectly normal human being, but on the inside, I was breaking down and becoming ecstatic at the same time. I hated the fact that I was leaving my other family here at the Tattoo Guesthouse: Pia, Liap, Da, Ti, Ti, Jan, and Beat. I hated the fact that the trip was over so soon. And I hated knowing that their hearts were hurting as well.
But I loved knowing that I would be seeing my family again. And I loved that I was traveling once more. But I wished that I could see the kids one more time before we left.
As we began saying our final good-byes to the staff, Beat began crying. She began working there in the middle of our stay, and Nikko and I had gotten very close with her. We were the first customers she ever got to know intimately, and I hope she will remember us. She is so little, littler even than me, and I hugged her as tightly as I could. I will always remember their hospitality at the Tattoo Guesthouse, and how they treated us as if we were their own. How we could laugh together easily, smile easily, and had our own inside jokes. How we could tease each other lovingly, even though we couldn't always understand the other.
I hugged each and every one of them, and waved until we couldn't see them anymore.
I cried silently in the van, and at the same time I comforted Nikko and Ava. We had Raksmey with us in the van, to say good-bye to Lisa-Marie at the airport, and she brought gifts from some of the kids. A few of us received handmade bracelets.
We pulled up to the airport, and I thought about my experiences with the kids, and as I was thinking, I could have sworn that I saw Heang peaking out behind one of the concrete pillars. I sighed and knew I was seeing things, but as we got closer, I saw Houen as well, and Srey Neat, and I breathed out. I wasn't seeing anything. They were there.
We screamed, and smiled, and laughed, and pounded on the windows, wanting to get to them as quickly as we could. We piled out of the van, and were greeted with hugs, and kisses on the cheek, and huge smiles. I ran straight to my boys and pulled them into a hug. It was the happiest moment I have ever had.
Immediately, kids began pulling out gifts for us. They were all dressed up in their nicest clothes, and they had brought things for us. But those weren't the gifts in my eye. Seeing my Cambodian family again, and for the last time before we left, was the best gift I have ever gotten, better than any material thing that you could have given me.
We walked into the airport, with the kids still outside. We finished getting our bags chequed, and ran to the windows. Our hands pressed up agains the glass that separated us, mouthing to each other that we loved them, the tears began again.
This time, it was Sambo who broke me down. This was the boy who is the smiliest, happiest, person, the last person in the world I expected to cry. But to see his face, with his silent tears running down his face, as I pressed my hands against the glass in my attempts to reach them, I began to cry. Houen, Heang, Raksmey, and Srey Neat surrounded me on the other side. We cried together, and told each other that we loved each other THIS much, with our arms stretched out wide, and I smiled in spite of my tears. I love these children so much, and I can't ever say it enough.
Hauling our backpacks up the escalator, CPO ran with us along the huge glass windows. Ava, Mallory, Nikko, Zoe and I crowded the last sliver of window at the top, and said our final good-byes. We walked slowly away, as the last of our bittersweet tears ran down our faces.
I will always remember them.